Vacuum Tubes

by Brad Rose

Whenever I have trouble remembering names and faces, I reverse the direction of my blood. The reality of modern life is that we’re interrupted all the time, but you’ve got to start somewhere. Besides, who knows what the machines are really thinking? Sometimes it’s hard to know if this is an archaeological site, or a bioluminescent crime scene, but if you wear a thought-diffusing helmet and insulated rubber boots, you too can help prevent alien abductions. I didn’t want to mention this, but I’m enrolled in Psychic University’s School of Quantum Uncertainty, although it seems they’ve lost my records again. No big deal. When you get into town, just give me a call. I’ll hook up the high-frequency vacuum tubes and tell the admissions office you’re ready for almost anything.